And a little child shall lead them

Every now and then I post about my daughter. I'll say she gives me inspiration and how blessed I am to have her and all the basic mom things. I never boast about her but for this post I must. 

For those who don't know my daughter came early. Not super early but early enough that her name didn't match her season, lol. I always say that her name is confused because it doesn't match when she was born. I worried that because she was early that she would be slightly delayed. That she wouldn't hit all her milestones like she was supposed to. I even went so far as to have her tested. Yea I know anxious April strikes again. But no really I was worried. But she was just where she was supposed to be. She was moving at her own pace. Now at 18 months I've gotten to the point where I don't compare her anymore. So much so that I didn't recognize how advanced she actually is. She talks in almost a complete sentence. Can count to 10. Can point out things in books, and places and is just excelling further than I would've ever imagined. But see I didn't notice that part. I just thought my daughter was doing what an 18 month old was suppose to do. 

I've never broadcasted this but I feel that I must for you to get my point. At the age of 8 months she was left in the house by herself. Not by my hand but by someone who I thought was equally responsible. It was the worse feeling anyone could imagine. To have your child left unattended while you think they're safe. I immediately did what I needed to do and filed for full custody of her. Despite what others have said about me these last 10 months I still know until this day I wouldn't have responded any other way than the steps I've taken to keep her safe.  But despite everything that I've tried to do to keep her safe , I still have to reluctantly hand her over to the person who left her. It's heartbreaking to say the least. I've cried and cried and screamed in my pillow. Thrown up from worry. Just a complete mess because I didn't know what was going on with her. And I still don't know to this day. I ask about her and get no response. I give information about her routine its disregarded etc etc etc. It's pure torture. Now this isn't a bashing session by far because when it all boils down to it I chose this man to be her father and without him I wouldn't have her. So for that I'm eternally grateful. But I was a fool and we all know what God says about children and fools. 

I was given a child that's wiser than I could ever imagine for a reason. When she isn't given the things she's suppose to get, she can ask. When she doesn't want something she can say no. She has the ability to remember the things I tell her. She may not understand but she can remember like the elephant that she knows and is able to pronunciate clearly in her book. She knows. 

So I can't say I won't worry because it's parental nature to and I can't say I won't question because that's a given. But I will always remember that she was created for such a time as this and the gift she was given was no accident. It was divine intervention to teach those who seem to be unteachable, unreachable, or plain prideful.